I study, and study and study the Deen and finally get some peace and then I go to Iftaar at someones place, and yet when I go to apply it, one negative, poison filled sentence sent my way shatters my peace and makes me regress into my previous sarcastic self.

What should I do to retain my peace, with my God, my surroundings and myself? I need your advice, please take the poll of the options to resolve this:

15 thoughts on “THE DILEMMA………. NEED YOUR ADVICE

  1. salamalaikum
    Personally, as I know my state of eeman is so vulnerable, I deliberately choose to sit next to people who I know, to my best, are either in the same boat as me or better than me. Alhumdullilah, I have not been in a gethering where I did not find such people. This way, I ensure healthy discussion ( or no discussion) and humbly walk away thinking I did my best and Allah (swt) knows best. For me it is sometimes people very close to me who do not understand the urgency of our situation (wasting away precious time in ramadan) and I know they are not always ready to hear me out but I do speak, for Allah’s sake, when I just get overwhelmed with our heedlessness. It is up to Allah to guide and it is upto us to keep enforcing His deen after He (swt) has given what we were so desperately missing before- a drop from the ocean of His bounty of guidance.


    • JazaikAllah hu Khairan sister Anjum. I am torn between the responses. I wonder would it be ghaibah if I wrote a pos taobut the circustances without divulging the people involved? I am quite confident they do not read this blog.


      • but if they did read it, or say, someone told them about this blog, and they read it and knew who you are talking about , would that be gheebah? I think so… more inportantly, what if your understanding of the situation or their comment is wrong and they did not mean it the way you understood it. Then it would be slander. My suggestion! do not write about it and make dua for them.


  2. Assalamu’alaikum. I think it depends on the situation and the person. If you feel you can get your point across and the person is willing to hear it out, I would try to explain it further. I have found there are many people just looking for a debate/argument. If it is one of those situations, I would make sure to comment that I find what he/she said offensive and request everyone to change the subject out of respect for one another. You can read all about how disliked it is to debate when there is no end in sight. Sometimes the hardest thing is learning how to walk away from the conversation.


  3. Assalamu Alikom, If you know the answer to the question and have full knowledge and truthfulness of what you are about to say to the other party ( in a humble, respectful manner), by all means explain away as long as you dont give out fatwas like candy . Otherwise, keep your peace.


  4. Hey Assalamaulaykum wr. I feel its always best to discuss. This way we get their opinion too and our knowledge may increase as well. But it is essential to be humble about it or people may get annoyed and say you act all holier-than-thou.. lol


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