You ask with surprise why do I want to go to Mecca again? And why for the last ten days of Ramadan? So let me collect my thoughts and share them with you.
In the odd nights of the last ten days of Ramadan is a night, the Night of Power or the Night of Decree called Lailatul Qadr. On this night the Quran was revealed to Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him). In the last part of the Quran is a brief surah about Lailat ul Qadr (Night of Decree/Night of Power). Allah Subhanwa Taa’la says this about the night in which the Quran was sent down:
Surah 97:1-5 “Certainly we sent it down on the Night of Power, and what will convey to you What the night of Power is?
The Night of power is better than a thousand months.
The angels and The Spirit descend in it, by the permission of their Lord, with all decrees.
Peace it is till the rising of the dawn.”
It is this peace promised in the Quran, in this surah that I desire to experience, in addition to the peace that settles into every cell of my body and heart when I am in the House of Allah, it whisks me away from worldly distractions, daily chores and obligations, and worries of daily life. I am safe from the reaches of all anxieties, grief and the trial and tribulations that come with life and living.
I wish to seek sanctuary for ten days and nights, making my prayers as the night of Power arrives in all its essence and with all its ramifications and envelopes me, in the House of Allah.
It is said that the Peace promised during this night brings with it the angels who “descend by the permission of their Lord” and on finding a slave of Allah praying, drape her with their wings. Wherever the angels are, with them comes the mercy of Allah. I want to be one of those who receive this bounty of Allah in His home.
A man once asked Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him for a “brief & simple” advice about “life”. The Prophet peace and blessings upon him said: “Take five before five”
1. Use your youth wisely before you become old and are unable to do the things that will get you closer to Allah.
2. Use your health before illness befalls you
3. Use your wealth before poverty strikes you
4. Use your free time before you become busy
5. Use your life before death takes you
This year Alhamdullillah I am relatively young, relatively healthy, relatively well to do, and relatively less busy at this time of this year. Any or all of these may change by next Ramadan.
I know that it has been said and may cross the minds of those who hear or read of my going to Mecca AGAIN that this is “excessive”.
There are not a fixed number of times for anyone that is “enough”. For each person is his or her own measure. To many people the Kaaba calls but they do not hear it because of the ambient noise of this world, to others the Kaaba calls and they are unable or not ready to make the trip, and for some, once is enough. There is no magic number that defines “enough” One time does not fit all. It is entirely an individual feeling.
I personally feel I have served my family all my life. I feel I have been a good wife, a good daughter, a good mother and a good sister, doing my best to fulfill all these roles and my huqooq al ebad to the best of my abilities.
At this juncture of my life, above all things, I need the peace, comfort and spirituality to sink into me and the mercy of Allah to envelope me as I experience the Night of Power in the Kaaba.
I pray that I have the stamina, health and ability to experience the Night of Power in the Kaaba. Ameen.
My hope is that Inshallah my friends and family will understand why this means so much to me, and pray that Allah may grant me this wish!