NOSTALGIA: DUA TO ENTER THE MASJID

There are holes in the line where my friends stood in Jumma and now they are gone……………..

Right as we speak they are entering the Masjid el Haraam and as they lay eyes on the House of My Lord, they are stunned and speechless…………………….I close my eyes and I am with them, right beside them gazing at the House of our Lord, and I too am speechless………..

The doors of the Masjid el Haraam:courtesy: http://www.flickr.com/photos/53967601@N00/2335040068/

The dua for entering the Masjid

‘I take refuge with Allaah, The Supreme and with His Noble Face, and His eternal authority from the accursed devil. In the name of Allaah, and prayers and peace be upon the Messenger of Allaah.

O Allaah, open the gates of Your mercy for me.’

I close my eyes and I am there, I open my eyes and I pray that I will soon be there, Inshallah!

A DUA FOR WHEN MUSLIMS FIGHT MUSLIMS……….

	Surah Zumar 46
	Transliteration 46; Quli allahumma fatira alssamawati waalardi AAalima alghaybi waalshshahadati anta tahkumu baynaAAibadika fee ma kanoo feehi yakhtalifoona
	Yusuf Ali 46: Say: “O Allah. Creator of the heavens and the earth! Knower of all that is hidden and open! it is Thou that wilt judge between Thy Servants in those matters about which they have differed.”
	French 46: Dis: ‹Ô Allah, Créateur des cieux et de la terre, Connaisseur de tout ce que le monde ignore comme de ce qu’il perçoit, c’est Toi qui jugeras entre Tes serviteurs ce sur quoi ils divergeaient›.
	Spanish 46: Di: “¡Alá, creador de los cielos y de la tierra! ¡El Conocedor de lo oculto y de lo patente! Tú decidirás entre Tus siervos sobre aquello en que discrepaban”.
	Indonesian 46: Katakanlah: “Ya Allah, Pencipta langit dan bumi, Yang mengetahui barang ghaib dan yang nyata, Engkaulah Yang memutuskan antara hamba-hamba-Mu tentang apa yang selalu mereka memperselisihkannya”.
	Melayu 46: Ucapkanlah (wahai Muhammad): Wahai Tuhan yang menciptakan langit dan bumi, yang mengetahui perkara-perkara yang ghaib dan yang nyata, Engkaulah jua yang mengadili di antara hamba-hambaMu, mengenai apa yang mereka sentiasa berselisihan padanya.
	German 46: “Sprich: “”O Allah! Schöpfer der Himmel und der Erde! Kenner des Verborgenen und des Offenbaren! Du allein wirst zwischen Deinen Dienern richten über das, worüber sie uneins waren.”"
	Russian 46: Скажи: «О Аллах, Творец небес и земли, Ведающий сокровенное и явное! Ты рассудишь Своих рабов в том, в чем они расходились во мнениях».
	Bosnian 46: Reci: “Allahu, Stvoritelju nebesa i Zemlje, Ti koji znaš nevidljivi i vidljivi svijet, Ti ćeš robovima Svojim presuditi u onome oko čega su se razilazili!”

Dua: The final wish……………

Submission: Laying All Worries in front of Him…………….

Surah Tawbah 009.129 : But if they turn away, Say: “Allah sufficeth me: there is no god but He: On Him is my trust,- He the Lord of the Throne (of Glory) Supreme!”

FEAR & FAITH: PART TWO: WHOM DO YOU FEAR?

FEAR comes in many guises. There are small fears and large fears.

Let us look at the “small” fears……….

It is a Friday in little town USA. I am going to invite you to imagine yourself in this scenario and, evaluate where you stand in each of the scenarios. This exercise is to evaluate our own self on the scale of who do we fear, and how do we modulate our behavior based on that fear.

In some cases we are not even aware of whom we fear and this fear and its result is reflected in our actions.

It is Friday………………..
A.    I wake up in the morning, I slept late and thus I wake up very close to end of Fajr, and I realize I will be late for work if I pray Fajr, so I bypass it saying to myself that Allah is Ghafoor rur Raheem, and dress and go to work.

What have I done?

I have violated a right of Allah because of my fear of my boss or my fear of losing my job and my sustenance……..in this one act of fear of someone other than Allah I have relegated my boss in dunya as a small God that takes precedence over God Almighty my Creator and Sustainer.

By fearing the loss of my job and sustenance, and violating the rights of Allah Subhanawataala I have denied what we are assured in the Quran and what I as a Muslim repeat 17 times each day while reciting Surah Fatiha: which is:

Aooudobillahi minish shaytaan nir rajeem, Bismillah hir rahman nir Raheem.
Alhamdollilllahi Rabil Alameen

In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful (1)
Praise be to Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the Worlds.

Thus I have lied 17 times a day because my actions do not match what my lips say. Saying one thing and doing another. Such people have a name in the Quran and their abode is well described, in the bottom of the deepest level of THE FIRE.
In Summary:
One act of omission led to two violations of the rights of Allah and one forbidden act of lying. i.e.
1.    Not praying fajr
2.     Relegating power over my sustenance to my boss and,
3.    While in other salahs……saying one thing and doing another i.e. lying to Allah Subhanawataala.

B. Next I then go to work and being a conscientious Muslim, I take time off to pray Jooma, which is mandatory.
In Surah Jumma Allah Subhanawataala says:
062.009 YUSUFALI: O ye who believe! When the call is proclaimed to prayer on Friday (the Day of Assembly), hasten earnestly to the Remembrance of Allah, and leave off business (and traffic): That is best for you if ye but knew!

I reach the masjid and I find myself wearing clothes that outline or incompletely cover my awrah, e.g. western pants with a tucked in shirt which in both men and women are inadequate dress for prayer.

HADITH Book 47, Number 47.2.9:
Yahya related to me from Malik from Salama ibn Safwan ibn Salama az-Zuraqi that Zayd ibn Talha ibn Rukana, who attributed it to the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, ‘Every Deen has an innate character. The character of Islam is modesty.’ “

Why do I dress like this for Jooma?

Here my fear is……………….. that I might look out of place or strange when I leave the masjid, and therefore I succumb to that fear and compromise the rights of Allah, in appearing before Him inadequately or inappropriately dressed despite having the means to do so.

I have made someone or something other than Allah my small god whom I fear and thus wish to please more than my wish to please my Creator and Sustainer.

C. Next the adhaan is called and at the same time I see a sister I haven’t seen in a while so I get up and go up to her give her my salaam and ask about her family.

What did Rasool Allah salal lahi alayhe wasalaam do when the adhan was called?

In a hadith related from the Ummahaat e Momineen and I paraphrase: “When Rasool Allah peace be upon him would be with us and the adhaan would be called his facial expression would change, he would become a stranger and would fall silent as if he was far away and not with us anymore”

Volume 1, Book 11, Number 585: Narrated Abu Said Al-Khudri:

Allah’s Apostle said, “Whenever you hear the Adhan, say what the Mu’adhdhin is saying”.

In the Quran Allah Subhanawataala says and I paraphrase “obey me and obey the Rasool”  (ayah) and at another place “follow the Rasool”

008.046 And obey Allah and His Messenger; and fall into no disputes, lest ye lose heart and your power depart; and be patient and persevering: For Allah is with those who patiently persevere

Thus when I get up at Adhaan and talk to this sister, what is the little fear in my heart? Perhaps I do not want to be excluded from her social circle, or I want to be popular, or some other altruistic reason…………..all of which pale before my disobedience of the Sunnah, and my ignoring the footsteps of RasoolAllah peace and blessing be on him.
Even though Allah Subhanawataala has put me in a place, time and people where following Rasool Allah (peace be upon him) sunnah has been made easy for me.

Of course I am either oblivious of what I am doing which means I am in Ghafala, (I am ignorant of the steps of the Rasool peace be upon him) or I am deliberately disobedient or my fear of losing my place in dunya has propelled me to ignore the sunnah of the adhaan.

D. Next the iqamaah is called and I am not sure where I should stand; I want to stand near the exit so that I can scoot out when the prayer finishes, as I have to go to lunch with a friend or have to go back to work, and in this flurry of indecision I miss my opportunity of making dua:

Book 2, Number 0521:  Hadith Narrated Anas ibn Malik: Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings be upon him said:
“The supplication made between the adhan and the iqamah is not rejected”

Thus here my fear of displeasing my boss, my friend take precedence over my desire to be in the best possible position for salah, which is directly behind the imam for brothers and the last line directly behind the imam for women if there is no separation between men and women. In addition I have lost the moment of dua……

E. During the salaah, I am uplifted to the presence of Allah Subhanawataala and I am overtaken with His words and I forget dunya. As soon as salaah finishes I begin the masnoon supplications and Dhikr of Rasool Allah saw in an attempt to follow his path.
People around me begin to talk and my attention is distracted and my intentions to do the Dhikr after salah evaporates, and with this act the angels of mercy that surround my musallah, get up and leave.

F. Abandoning my resolve to do even the briefest of Dhikr i.e. the tasbeeh Fatima (RA) I get up to do my Sunnah.  As I begin to pray I forget to place a sutrah in front of me. Partly because I am in a hurry, and fear being late for my next appointment………….again my fear of not pleasing dunya and its people supercedes my desire to please Allah SWT.

G. I start my Sunnah efficiently and with concentration. However my sisters who are in a hurry to go home, to work, or to shop or run errands pass in front of me, the hems of their dresses brushing against my head in sajdah, and I am reminded of three hadith that pertain to the sunnah prayer:

Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings be upon him instructed us as follows and I paraphrase:
1. “Place a sutrah in front of you for sunnah and nafil salah”
2. “Fight to keep a person from passing in front of you if you are praying Sunnah or nafil salah.
3. “If a person would know how detrimental it is to pass in front of a person performing salaah, they would never do it!

I have once again allowed my fears of dunya, i.e. my fear of being late for a dunya appointment interfere with my focus when I stand in front of my Lord.

To be continued……………………..

This is just the beginning of the blessed day of Jooma…………..

Whom do you fear?

THE TONGUE: AN INSTRUMENT OF DHIKR OR……….

I guess I would now be classified as a retreat veteran and yet when ever I open my notepad with pen poised, what I hear from the Shaykh is never a repetition of before but something new and energizing………

Does this mean that I have come along some, on the path of Tazkiyah? or does it mean that I missed part of what he said last time due to inattention? or my brain and my heart just did not register it as they were not ready to accept this new concept of living?…………..or a possibility that may be true but difficult for me to admit is that my Nafs and my arrogance stood like a wall when some of the things were said?

When I had first started on this path I wondered why I was here at the retreat. What would I learn from a bunch of lectures, early mornings, late nights and patience and prayer that I could not do by myself?

As the time at the retreat unfolded, after the initial discomfort of my body, my heart and mind started to transcend the physical discomfort and dive into the Shaykh’s method of teaching, which he describes as:
“We learn to do” and “We do to learn”
It is only when you have sat for what seems like a very long time between Asar and Maghrib repeating the evening Dhikr that you realize, there is a hyperactive child within you that wants to get up and go………..the hyperactive inattentive child or is it the headstrong brat of my Nafs that want to get it done and be over with it and go out.

It is only when the Nafs is patted down on the head repeatedly, quietened with a consistent discipline and not given attention that it finally calms down. It is then that the first opening occurs in the true connection with Allah Subhanawataala…………..it may last a few seconds, minutes or even longer if you have better control of your Nafs.

Thus it was the “doing” that I practiced and have continued to practice with the morning evening Dhikr after fajr and as often as I could after Asar that finally brought me to a point in this retreat when I actually began to enjoy the Dhikr with the slow passage of light from Asar to Maghrib in the skylights of the musallah.

As the words of Dhikr left my lips and ascended to my Creator, It brought me an intense feeling of being loved and enfolded in a sensation which can be translated into happiness or security…………even though fleetingly.

“Doing, teaches us more than listening to teachings,” said the Shaykh and I am living proof of that. Three retreats ago, I could not fold my feet to sit in Tashahud to do my Dhikr; I changed posture uncountable times in an hour. Overcoming the Nafs in me that pestered me like a hyperactive brat, by “doing” finally got me past the brat.

The morning Dhikr which is my favorite. I guess because it is long and it takes me a little while to get warmed up. This Dhikr comprises of a series of stunningly comprehensive masnoon supplications that engulf the physical, emotional, and personal needs at every level that one can think of. No wonder Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings be upon him, did this Dhikr on a regular basis………….

It also is a protective shield from all evil things and obsessive ill thoughts. When I read the translation of the supplications I can recognize why. Hidden in the simple though potent words, are supplications that protect you, bring blessings on you, shower you with spiritual, emotional and physical health and protect you from the arch enemy of our father, Adam (AS) and his progeny.

“Dua or supplication is emphasized as an essential part of being on the Path of the Seeker”

“Thus the Dhikr is………….to beg Allah, to be prayerful in heart, mind, soul and tongue”

“The lack of dua is a sign of “kibr” or arrogance……….says Allah Subhanawataala in the Quran, and recommends the abd (slave) to often be in dua.“

“Prophet Muhammad pbuh had long stretches of quietness…….as he was constantly in Dhikr”

The tongue can either be in idle chatter or in Dhikr…….thus we as Muslims are taught to be reflective of what we say and to say only what is meaningful, true, sincere and beautiful (with ehsaan). Even better is to remain silent and be in Dhikr.

This permission to remain silent has been one of the most stress releasing aspects that I was introduced to at the retreat. I have always been “the mediator” all my life and have taken it upon my self to entertain the wall flower, to be the liaison between two strangers etc etc……….I was happy to learn, though it took quite some time (three retreats☺) before I could actually be happy and not feel guilty, not to talk and be in silent dhikr.

Our voice is an instrument…………we can use it in so many ways……….Allah Subhanawataala  instructs us in the Quran….”shield your voice” or “lower your voice”.
Luqman (AS) advice to his son in the Quran is:
“And be moderate in thy pace, and lower thy voice; for the harshest of sounds without doubt is the braying of the ass.” 031.019 Yusufali’s translation:

The final words of the Shaykh regarding this aspect were “Guard the tongue, it was put behind two prisons (the lips and the teeth) for a reason” It can lash out and say things that cannot be recalled, or say things to fill the sound void and then we become responsible on the Day of Judgment for each word uttered.

Silent Dhikr………………it took me three retreats of “doing” to know what it means and what happens when you actually “do” it!

Excerpts and reflections from the Retreat on Tazkiyah Nafs 09 with Shaykh Mokhtaar Magroubi (Most of the the statements in inverted comma’s are quotes from the Shaykh)

The Adhkaars (Dhikr) after Salah can be found at :http://ibnayyub.wordpress.com/2007/12/29/adhkaar-after-salah-sheikh-haitham-al-haddad/

The Cure For Your Heart Attack………..10:57

Dedicated to all my brothers and sisters who have suffered from a Heart Attack…………….

a letter……………….

Asalaam-o-alaikum my dear brother,

You have been in my thoughts and prayers ever since I heard of your near miss with a heart attack, I have read and re read your note updating us on your physical state. In between the lines the sadness, the sorrow, the resignation and fear of disability leak out with the pain and perseverance of being downed physically, and patched in between are rays of hope with supplications.

I have thought about writing a response and have had no words come to me till this morning as I sat down to review the tafseer of Surah Younus with Dr. Farhat Hashmi, and as I reached this ayah I felt, Allah Subhanwataala was putting words where I had none …………

يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلنَّاسُ قَدۡ جَآءَتۡكُم مَّوۡعِظَةٌ۬ مِّن رَّبِّڪُمۡ وَشِفَآءٌ۬ لِّمَا فِى ٱلصُّدُورِ وَهُدً۬ى وَرَحۡمَةٌ۬ لِّلۡمُؤۡمِنِينَ (٥٧)

(O mankind! There hath come unto you an exhortation from your Lord, a balm for that which is in the breasts, a guidance and a mercy for believers. (10: 57)
and:
17.082
We send down (stage by stage) in the Qur’an that which is a healing and a mercy to those who believe: to the unjust it causes nothing but loss after loss.

As Dr. Farhat Hashmi explained, I was rooted to the  spot:
Tafseer:

A man came to RasoolAllah (pbuh) and he complained about his heart and said, “ I have pain in my heart” RasoolAllah responded “read (recite) Quran because Allah SWT says that this Quran is a cure for what is in the breast. (Your heart) “

In the chest resides the heart and it has lots of diseases both spiritual and physical. In The spiritual diseases include envy (hasad) riya, keena, badgumani, anger, badneeyati, arrogance, depression, sadness, sorrow, ujub, Bughuz, and many others.
Allah Subhanawataala has given the cure to Mankind at large and to the Momineen specifically

However, when do the words of God become a cure? This depends on if the cure is known and used, in the therapeutic manner that has been prescribed by Allah Subhanwataala and I paraphrase “for truly in Dhikr do ones heart finds rest”.

If the medicine that is going to cure an ailment sits on a counter and is not administered it does not work. Medicine only works when the medicine is taken at the correct time in the correct dose, and in the ideal frequency. Thus is the Quran it cannot be a cure if it sits unused in both the frequency and doses as prescribed by our Rasool (pbuh). If it remains in a bookshelf wrapped in a cover, it cannot work as a cure for our hearts.

The first step is to believe that Allah Subhanataala has given us the solution of every problem in dunya in the Quran. How does the Quran become a cure? It becomes a cure for our ailment when one honestly and sincerely begins to recite and review the Quran, the answers and solutions unravel as one reads, reviews and connects with yaqeen with Allah through His Subhanwataala’s words.

If psychologically one does not have yaqeen that Allah has sent this as a cure, it does not work. Neither does it work if one is insincere, and the ikhlaas between Allah and me is missing. The wall of cynicism, insincerity and arrogance in ones own abilities has to come down for the cure to be poured on us and instilled in us.

When we sit and read the Quran, the pain, the fear, the sorrow that is in our hearts and chest eases as Allah Subhanawataala’s words speak to us.
Only if we have approached Him and His words with sincerity with the true belief and yaqeen that He truly does what is best for us, and that He created us and wants us to turn to Him when in difficulty or in pain. It is only then that His words, and instructions become the cure.
As I listened to her tafseer  I reflected on my own experience and I share it with you:

My experience:
If one approaches the Quran in search for a cure, as a solution for pain both physical and psychological, and we place all our symptoms, pains, aches, disabilities, and agonies in front of Him and we recite His words in search…………..of solutions, He turns to us.

He guides our hands and minds to the solutions hidden in the pages of the Mushaf.
Something we may have read before with a closed heart and mind or as a literary interest rather than a spiritual act of seeking help, cure, and treatment, now transforms into a solution to our desperate search.

Suddenly the pages open to the words that seem like they were written for me. Words that are the cure for the pain in my heart, for my tired brain searching for solace, peace and comfort. I wonder how come I had read this ayah before and it had never registered as a solution of my continuing agony and my persistent ailment of huzn.

Being an allopathic physician we are taught to discount all spiritual aspects of treatment. The reason being that some charlatans have used it to dupe innocent people, who are in need of help for either a physical ailment that does not respond to regular medicine or an agony for which they have been told there is no cure. Thus we as physicians have used the either or paradigm and discarded the process as well as the source without really looking into the reasons.

Thus as I read the Quran knowing that all avenues of help and solace are closed and that I desperately need His help, for the pain is unremitting and there is no relief in sight, I am keenly aware that the only way the agony in my breast, of loss, loneliness and separation from my child, can ease, lies in His hands. I realize that I can only get to the cure through Him.

I also know that this time the act of opening the Quran is not like the hundred others in the past. This time it is a focused search till I find it, whether it comes with the first line or last………..

Thus it has been for me, at any time of the day or night.

One morning before work, I am in agony as I find myself standing in the computer room, and the Quran lying on my desk calls to me. I stand irresolute, immobile, frozen with grief near the computer seeing my son in my minds eye, smiling and vibrant with life and then he dissolves in front of my eyes and I cannot even recall an image.
I take a step and I open the cover and randomly open a section…….and read. From the depths of darkness He lowers a rope for me: ”every soul will taste death” and” and the believers who are tested will say: It is from him we come and to him we shall return:
002.155: Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere,
002.156 Who say, when afflicted with calamity: “To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return”:
002.157: They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance.

…………and yet at other times I want to find an ayah and I cannot find it .………. someone has told me about it in the passing that it brings relief, and I cannot find it……..it is only when I sit at a spiritual retreat studying the word of the Divine, thousands of miles away from home, that in an atmosphere charged with the words of Allah Subhanawataala, as I listen to Surah Zumar, that I suddenly come upon it.

I am in a room where the Surah is being recited, reviewed and explained, surrounded by pious women that His Subhanawataala’s words of solace,and forgiveness engulf my heart like a poultice of cure, bringing instant relief. The written words are blurred with my tears but now I can find them as they are engraved on my heart “la taknatu mer rahmatullah………..
039.053 Say: “O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah: for Allah forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

039.054: “Turn ye to our Lord (in repentance) and bow to His (Will), before the Penalty comes on you: after that ye shall not be helped.

What can I say………………. I have no advice for you. You have to seek the cure with your own efforts.  I write prescriptions for my patients every day for irreversible diseases of the brain and yet I have been searching for a medicine for my own heart in all the wrong places.

So to those ………who have had a heart attack and are struggling with the cardiac drugs know that you too will die one day and that day is fixed, and nothing you do will change it. All suffering before you do so and after you do so, depends entirely on how you conduct the days of your life (with respect to Allah Subhanawataala) after the heart attack.

I am honored that He, Subhanawataala has handed me The Cure to my pain, and yet it is I who must take the correct dose, at the correct time and with the correct frequency, for when I forget in the distractions of dunya, the agony of grief returns with a vengeance.

The Quran………the Divine word in my house, on my desk, needs to be in my heart constantly and consistently to bring me peace, love and purity.

May Allah Subhanwataala give you the cure for your heart and may you use it as instructed by RasoolAllah pbuh, and may it bring you relief, heart health and keep you on the path of Allah, who is The Giver and The Healer. Ameen

Please forgive me for my past mistakes and if I have said or done anything to offend you. Everything correct that I have said is from Allah Subhanawataala and anything wrong is from me and from the wasswassaas of Shaitaan on me and my Nafs. May Allah Subhanawataala forgive me and accept my efforts. I am deeply thankful for all He has given me.

As you read this please remember to keep me in your prayers

Your sister in Islam

A Prayer for Health and global well being and protection…….

Going as a family for salah at the Masjed e Nabvi

“Ô Allaah, I ask You for pardon and well-being in this life and the next. Ô Allaah, I ask You for pardon and well-being in my religious and worldly affairs, and my family and my wealth.

Begging for Wisdom, Sustenance & Action

Learning Quran in China courtesy www.flickr.com/Quran

A Dua to protect against the Fitna of Dajjal‏

اَللَّهُـمَّ إِنيِّ أَعوُذُ بِكَ مِنْ عَذاَبِ جَهَنَّمَ،وَمِنْ عَذاَبِ الْقَبْرِ وَمِنْ فِتْـنَةِ الْمَحْياَ وَالْمَماَتِ وَمِنْ فِتْـنَةِ الْمَسيِحِ الدَّجاَّلِ اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ الْمَأْثَمِ وَالْمَغْرَمِ

Allahumma inni a’udhu bika min ‘adhabi jahannam, wa min ‘adhabil-qabr, wa min fitnatil-mahya wal-mamat, wa min fitnatil-masihid-Dajjal.  Allahumma ‘inni ‘a’udhu bika minal ma’thami wal maghrami.

O Allah! I seek Your protection from the torture of hell, and I seek Your protection from the torture of the grave, and I seek refuge with You from the mischief of life and death, and I seek Your protection from the mischief of Dajjal pretending as Messiah.  O Allah! I seek refuge in You from sin and from debt.

[Sahih al-Bukhari 2:102, Muslim 1:412, 588]

Prophet Mohammad (pbuh) used to read in every salah before ending the salah