I am working and I glance out of the window at the falling rain and wonder……if the grass is sprouting from the seeds I left on his grave……..
I sit down to write and someone has pushed the keyboard to the right making place for his left-handedness………..
Three butterflies chasing each other………
My days are sprinkled with the diamonds of my memories, clear scintillating and razor edged sharp with loss.
And I remind myself to say: Inna lil lahi wa inna elaye rajeown…..
Categories: Balm for a never ending heartache · grief
Tagged: grief, memories, son, Tariq
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4 responses so far ↓
Anisur Rahman // November 11, 2009 at 1:17 pm |
Dear Sister,
Assalamualikum.
The grasses will grow, the flowers will blossom and all will be same…except that the gnawing pain will stay. Yesterday 10th Nov, was my birthday. I visited a student of mine who had a baby girl born yesterday. She is alo the daughter of one of my classmates. I looked at the happy family, busy changing the diaper and taking photographs of the procedure. It reminded me of days 22 years before. Why was I deprived of a normal life? Then suddenly I remembered I am not to be envious of other’s happiness. Allah Has decided that on my birtday a little girl will be born and I shall spend the end of the day crying infront of my son’s grave. I walk to my car, after politely refusing an offer of a sweet. I drive to the grave. Yes the grass is growing green…….Inshalah I fly for Hajj on Sunday.
asqfish // November 11, 2009 at 6:36 pm |
Walaikum Asalaam wa Rahmatullah e wa barakatahu,
Sometimes looking ahead is difficult, because it seems there is nothing much else to look forward to in this dunya, then look forward to Akhirah and position yourself in such a way that the doors to the Gardens of Jannah open for you.
When a baby is born and people come to congratulate, and the parents are proud and happy. No one knows how long that child will live in this world.
Once upon a time you and I also were in that position, thus all we can do is give them duas and pray that those parents never have to go through what we are going through.
Inshallah Allah Subhanawataala will give you many sons and daughters, perhaps not of your blood but through the bond of love, friendship and compassion.
May Allah Subhanawataala, keep you safe and protected in your journey, may the spirituality of His house gather you in His arms and provide you the solace you need and that He inshallah has in store for you.
May you have Hajj e Mabroor!
Please keep us in your prayers, All of the readers inshallah will be keeping you in their prayers.
May God be with you!
Salma Kazi // November 12, 2009 at 7:40 am |
Assalam alaikum
Read this often and each time you will read you will get reward inshallah
Imagine him in the Garden of Heaven unimaginably beautiful, in the hand of the Lord of the universe, our Creator, who love you 10 time more than your parents, full filling all his wishes, inshallah.
May Allah Subhanawataala keep him and my son and all others who lost their beloved children with the sons of our Prophet Mohammad Salal lahu alayhi wasalaam.
Ameen sum ameen
love and duas
asqfish // November 13, 2009 at 8:02 am |
Walaikum Asalaam1
Did you mean reciting “inna lil lahi wa inna elayhe rajaeown”
Inshallah I will!
Thank you for showing me and all the parents of kids who have passed away this beautiful view of Allah’s promise for our child and us.
May Allah reward you and May your son rest in the best part of Jannat ul Firdous el Alaa and invite you to be with him, and may Allah Subhanawataala grant his wish.
Ameen.